Over-analyzing?
Tuesday, January 25, 1995 - 10:45pm
Class was an interesting experience today. Shortly before starting the creativity project (collage), I started to wonder if the very act of thinking about the creative process could wind up destroying it. I've had experiences where over-intellectualizing made the natural, reflexive process impossible. For example, in playing tennis, allowing my mind and body to react instinctively makes for much better play than trying to consciously command myself to play in certain ways.
I started to worry that this could be the case for creativity, too. As I attempted to do some internal brainstorming, I couldn't help but think "oh, that corresponds to step so and so in the process..."
During the break immediately before starting the collage, I walked around the building, thinking up possible ideas. My mind came back to the basic premise of some of my previous work Art in the Service of the Environment. Given that theme, I started to run through ideas in my mind. Stopping at the atrium rail, I stared into the lush greenery below me... and eventually, the idea of a tree representing the environment arose, followed by the idea of art literally nurturing the tree at its roots. Sort of an interesting idea, but I wasn't at all sure how to implement it.
Arriving in the room, I had the general idea of using the colored tissue as a textured, dimensional building material for the tree itself. I set about picking some of the colors that I thought would be useful shades of green, brown, yellow, blue... I could use magazine clips of artwork for the art at the roots. I was having some difficulty visualizing this in any kind of aesthetically appealing way it just didn't look right in my minds eye. I then noticed (late) the instructions written on the board create something that tells about yourself... I rationalized to myself that my original idea fit within that guideline, though I was a little uneasy about the loose connection between the two.
Upon starting work, I crumpled and rolled a piece of brown tissue to serve as a basis for the trunk. I considered placing some yellow tissue inside the brown to give color dimensionality and a potential source for visual highlights. I rolled the yellow inside the brown, and I was immediately struck by the aesthetic appeal of the yellow within the brown. It looked a little like a pea pod, or something being nurtured or growing inside of an older brown case. I paused for a moment, then continued on with my original idea.... but shortly thereafter, I paused again. What if the yellow within the brown was new growth, emerging from the old. The image of the banana tree growing in my home came to mind, with its constant renewal of fresh growth emerging from the tired and fading leaves at its base. The connection between this and my own ongoing personal renewal hit me. I have been feeling an increasing sense of personal growth and positive change as I continue to pursue my goal of changing careers. I'm entering a field that gives me tremendous personal satisfaction and that stretches my talents and abilities to their limits. Those bright greens of new growth, emerging from the dying shell of the old, struck me as a powerful and extremely appropriate metaphor.
The process, once begun, continued almost automatically. My pace accelerated, and my additions became more confident, more sure. The addition of an emergent hint of red, as of a blossom just starting to arise from within the plant, came naturally. I could have continued on indefinitely, if not for the interruption of the incoming class. I didn't even notice for quite a while that most of my class had left the room! I was extremely satisfied with my piece, aesthetically and conceptually. The moment of creativity came at my bidding, as it always seems to do...
I suppose this refutes the notion that thinking too hard about the subject of creativity could kill the object of study. However, I wasn't thinking about the process at the peak moment of creativity. If I had, would I have been able to achieve what I did?
[ Out of Balance ]
author: Gerry
Manacsa
copyright 1996